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What Is Reciprocal IVF? Everything You Need to Know

Zoe Kaplan
Zoe Kaplan

Reciprocal IVF, known as “shared motherhood,” empowers same-sex couples to shape conception and gestation of their child.

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Jun 16, 2023
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Reciprocal IVF, known as “shared motherhood,” empowers same-sex couples to shape conception and gestation of their child.

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Reciprocal IVF, known as “shared motherhood,” empowers same-sex couples to shape conception and gestation of their child.

Reciprocal IVF, also known as "shared motherhood," is a fertility treatment that is growing in popularity. It's an option that empowers female same-sex couples to actively shape the conception and gestation of their child.

This approach to fertility combines the benefits of in vitro fertilization (IVF) with the desire for a biological connection. With reciprocal IVF, one partner contributes the eggs, which are then fertilized with carefully selected donor sperm. The embryos are then transferred to the other partner's uterus for pregnancy.

Understanding the intricacies of reciprocal IVF is crucial for individuals and couples who are exploring different paths to parenthood.

This article will give you the knowledge and insights to make informed decisions about your fertility journey, whether you're considering reciprocal IVF or seeking information to support a loved one.

What it is     Process     IVF vs. reciprocal IVF     Success rates     Cost

What is reciprocal IVF?

Reciprocal IVF is an assisted reproductive technique that enables both partners to actively participate in both the conception and gestation of their child, even if both partners have uteruses. It is a process that combines the principles of in vitro fertilization (IVF) with the desire for shared parental involvement.

In reciprocal IVF, one partner contributes the eggs while the other partner carries the pregnancy.

This approach provides an opportunity for both partners to have a biological connection to their child and experience the journey to parenthood together.

Reciprocal IVF process

The reciprocal IVF process involves several stages and typically follows the same fundamental steps as traditional IVF, with differences in who is involved in biological conception and who carries the pregnancy.

Initial consultation

You’ll typically meet with a fertility specialist or reproductive endocrinologist. During this consultation, they’ll review medical history and conduct necessary fertility tests.

Ovarian stimulation

The partner who plans to provide the eggs will take fertility medications to stimulate the ovaries to produce multiple mature eggs. The dosage and duration of medication will be determined based on individual factors and the fertility specialist's recommendations. Regular monitoring through blood work and ultrasound scans will be conducted to assess follicle growth and hormone levels.

Egg retrieval

Once the follicles reach the desired size, a thin needle is inserted into the ovaries to retrieve the mature eggs. The process usually takes around 20-30 minutes, and the retrieved eggs are then handed over to the laboratory.

Sperm collection

Simultaneously, the person who plans to contribute the sperm (referred to as the "sperm provider") provides a fresh semen sample on the day of the egg retrieval. If needed, alternative methods such as surgical sperm retrieval (testicular sperm extraction or epididymal sperm aspiration) can be used to obtain sperm.

Fertilization

Once the eggs and sperm are collected, they are brought together in the laboratory for fertilization. The chosen method of fertilization is typically in vitro fertilization (IVF) or intracytoplasmic sperm injection (ICSI). In IVF, the eggs and sperm are placed in a culture dish, allowing fertilization to occur naturally. With ICSI, a single sperm is injected directly into each mature egg to enhance the chances of fertilization.

Embryo development and transfer

After fertilization, the embryos are closely monitored in the laboratory for their development. The embryos are typically left to grow for a few days until they reach the desired stage of development for transfer. Selected embryos are then transferred into the uterus of the partner who will carry the pregnancy (referred to as the "recipient partner").

The number of embryos to be transferred will depend on various factors, including the recipient partner's age and the quality of the embryos. Any remaining viable embryos can be cryopreserved (frozen) for future use.

Pregnancy test and follow-up

Following the embryo transfer, a period of waiting begins to determine if the transfer was successful. Around 10-14 days after the transfer, the recipient partner will take a pregnancy test. If the test confirms a positive pregnancy, further monitoring and prenatal care will be initiated to support the ongoing pregnancy.

>>MORE: What Not to Do During the Two-Week Wait

It's important to note that the specific details of the reciprocal IVF process can vary based on individual circumstances and the protocols followed by the fertility clinic. Your fertility specialist will provide you with personalized guidance and support throughout each stage of the process, ensuring your unique needs and preferences are taken into account.

How long is the reciprocal IVF process?

The reciprocal IVF process typically spans several weeks to a few months.

While the length of the process may vary from couple to couple, each step of the process typically takes:

  • Initial consultation: One day for an initial consultation, then a few weeks to do testing and evaluation
  • Ovarian stimulation: 8 to 12 days
  • Egg retrieval and sperm collection: One day, usually done within the same day
  • Fertilization and embryo development: 3 to 6 days
  • Embryo transfer: a few minutes
  • Waiting period and pregnancy test: must wait 10-14 days before taking a test.

What is the difference between IVF and reciprocal IVF?

While both procedures involve assisted reproductive techniques, IVF and reciprocal IVF differ in biological contribution and typical parenthood models.

In IVF, the intended mother or an egg donor provides the eggs for fertilization, while the intended father or a sperm donor provides the sperm. The fertilized embryos are then transferred to the same intended mother's uterus or a gestational carrier for implantation and gestation.

>>RELATED: Navigating the Medications of IVF

In reciprocal IVF, the process involves having one partner contribute her genetic material through her eggs. The eggs are then fertilized outside of the body before being transferred into the other partner. The other partner then carries the pregnancy and gives birth to the child.

By embracing shared motherhood, reciprocal IVF celebrates the diversity of family-building options and supports the aspirations of individuals and couples in the LGBTQ+ community.

>>RELATED: Fertility Benefits Need to Include the LGBTQ+ Community

How successful is reciprocal IVF?

Reciprocal IVF has shown encouraging pregnancy success rates.

According to a study published in the Porto Biomedical Journal, the cumulative pregnancy rate per cycle in reciprocal IVF for female same-sex couples was reported to be around 60% after six cycles.

What is the cost of reciprocal IVF?

The cost of reciprocal IVF can vary depending on several factors, including geographic location, the specific fertility clinic, additional procedures or treatments required, and any insurance coverage.

While it’s challenging to provide exact figures due to the variability, here are some general cost considerations:

  • Fertility clinic fees: These fees typically include consultations, fertility assessments, ovarian stimulation medications, egg retrieval, sperm preparation, in vitro fertilization, embryo culture, and embryo transfer. The total cost for these clinic services can range from several thousand dollars to tens of thousands of dollars.
  • Medication costs: The medications used for ovarian stimulation and hormonal support during the reciprocal IVF process can contribute significantly to the total cost. The price of medications can vary depending on the dosage, brand, and duration of treatment. Some insurance plans may cover a portion of the medication costs.
  • Diagnostic tests and preparatory procedures: Prior to undergoing reciprocal IVF, individuals may need to undergo various diagnostic tests to assess fertility potential and overall health. These tests can include blood work, ultrasounds, and imaging studies. Additionally, preparatory procedures, such as hysteroscopy or sonohysterography, may be required to evaluate the uterine cavity and optimize the chances of successful embryo implantation.

>>MORE: Infertility is Expensive. Here Are 7 Ways To Save Money When Trying to Conceive.

Takeaway

Reciprocal IVF is a reproductive option that allows same-sex female couples to have a biological connection to their child. Through the use of assisted reproductive techniques, such as egg retrieval, fertilization, and embryo transfer, both partners can actively participate in the process of creating their family.

If you are considering reciprocal IVF, it is crucial to consult with a fertility specialist who can provide personalized guidance, assess your individual circumstances, and address any concerns you may have.

They will be able to outline the specific steps involved in the process, discuss success rates, and provide you with the necessary support throughout your journey.

Reciprocal IVF opens doors to parenthood and allows individuals and couples to create a family in a way that is meaningful to them. With advances in reproductive technologies and the support of medical professionals, you can have the opportunity to embark on an incredible journey towards building the family you have always dreamed of.

About the author

Zoe Kaplan
Zoe Kaplan is a writer and content strategist passionate about creating content that helps people navigate the world a little more easily. Zoe has worked across verticals, from women's career development to reproductive health. You can check out more of her work at zoeakaplan.com.

Sources

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perimenopause-periods
Should I still see my gynecologist if my periods are just "weird" but not painful?
Yes. Annual visits remain important during perimenopause. Your provider can help determine if your "weird" periods are typical perimenopause changes or something requiring attention. They can also discuss management options to improve your quality of life.
perimenopause-periods
How long do irregular periods last before menopause?
Irregular perimenopause periods typically last 4 to 8 years before your final period, though this varies greatly. Some women experience irregularity for just a few months, while others have irregular periods for over a decade before reaching menopause.
perimenopause-periods
Is it normal to have two periods in one month during perimenopause?
Yes, this can happen, especially in early perimenopause when cycles shorten. You might have a 21 day cycle, meaning you could have a period at the beginning and end of the same calendar month. Track these patterns to distinguish between short cycles and abnormal bleeding.
perimenopause-periods
Why are my periods suddenly so heavy in my 40s?
Heavy perimenopause periods often result from estrogen dominance. When progesterone drops but estrogen remains high, your uterine lining builds up more than usual, causing heavier bleeding when it sheds. This is common in perimenopause but should be evaluated if it affects your daily life.
perimenopause-periods
Can I still get pregnant if my periods are irregular during perimenopause?
Yes. As long as you're having periods, even irregular ones, you may still be ovulating. Pregnancy is possible until you've gone 12 full months without any period. If you don't want to become pregnant, continue using contraception throughout perimenopause.
perimenopause-and-weight-gain
Can you prevent perimenopause weight gain completely?
While you may not prevent all weight changes during perimenopause, you can minimize gain through proactive strategies. Starting strength training before perimenopause, maintaining consistent sleep habits, and managing stress can help your body adapt to hormonal changes more smoothly. Remember, some body changes during this transition are normal and healthy.
perimenopause-and-weight-gain
At what age does perimenopause weight gain typically start?
Perimenopause weight gain can begin in your late 30s or early 40s, often coinciding with the first hormonal changes. Many women notice gradual changes starting 5 to 10 years before their final period. The timing varies greatly based on genetics, lifestyle, and overall health.
perimenopause-and-weight-gain
Does everyone gain the same amount during perimenopause?
No. Perimenopause weight gain varies significantly. Some women gain 5 pounds, others 20 or more, and some maintain their weight. Factors include genetics, starting weight, activity level, stress, sleep quality, and how dramatically hormones fluctuate. Your experience is unique to your body.
Is perimenopause weight gain different from regular aging weight gain?
Yes. While metabolism naturally slows with age, perimenopause weight gain has distinct characteristics. The hormonal shifts cause fat redistribution to the midsection, even if overall weight doesn't change dramatically. This abdominal weight gain pattern is specifically linked to declining estrogen and progesterone, not just aging.
perimenopause-and-weight-gain
Will the weight come off after menopause?
Perimenopause weight gain often stabilizes after menopause when hormones level out, but the weight doesn't automatically disappear. The metabolic and body composition changes that occur during perimenopause tend to persist. However, with consistent healthy habits, weight management becomes more predictable post menopause than during the fluctuating perimenopause years.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
Can I take progesterone if I'm breastfeeding?
Yes, progesterone is generally safe while breastfeeding and doesn't significantly affect milk supply. However, always discuss with your healthcare provider before starting any hormone supplementation while nursing.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
Is it safe to take progesterone throughout pregnancy?
Yes, when prescribed by your healthcare provider. Progesterone supplementation in early pregnancy is safe and can reduce miscarriage risk in women with low progesterone or a history of pregnancy loss. Most providers continue supplementation through the first trimester (weeks 10-12) when the placenta takes over.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
Can progesterone supplementation cause weight gain?
Progesterone can cause temporary water retention and bloating, which may show up as a few pounds on the scale, but it doesn't cause true fat weight gain. Most women don't experience significant weight changes from progesterone supplementation.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
Can I switch from pills to suppositories or vice versa?
Yes, but only under your doctor's guidance. The dosing and timing may need adjustment when switching between forms since they're absorbed differently. Never switch on your own, especially if you're pregnant or undergoing fertility treatment.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
Will progesterone supplementation delay my period?
Yes, progesterone keeps the uterine lining intact, so if you're not pregnant and continue taking progesterone, your period will be delayed. Once you stop taking it, your period should start within 2-10 days. If you are pregnant, progesterone helps maintain the pregnancy and you won't get a period.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
Should I take progesterone pills orally or vaginally?
For fertility and pregnancy support, vaginal progesterone is usually preferred because it delivers higher concentrations directly to the uterus. For perimenopause or general hormone balance, oral progesterone often works well and is more convenient. Your doctor will recommend the best route based on your specific needs.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
When should I start taking progesterone after ovulation?
Typically, progesterone supplementation for luteal phase support starts 2-3 days after ovulation (confirmed by LH surge or temperature rise). Your doctor will give you specific timing based on your protocol. Some women start immediately after a positive ovulation test.
https://www.oova.life/blog/progesterone-supplementation-guide
What's better: progesterone cream or pills?
Pills (oral micronized progesterone) are generally more effective and reliable than creams because absorption from creams is inconsistent. For medical conditions like fertility issues, low progesterone, or HRT, prescription pills or suppositories are strongly recommended over over-the-counter creams.
https://www.oova.life/blog/low-vs-high-progesterone-symptoms
How can I tell if I have low or high progesterone?
The only definitive way to know is through hormone testing via blood tests or at-home urine tests that measure progesterone metabolites. However, symptom patterns can provide clues: anxiety and irregular periods suggest low progesterone, while bloating and extreme fatigue suggest high progesterone.
https://www.oova.life/blog/low-vs-high-progesterone-symptoms
When during my cycle should I test progesterone levels?
Test progesterone levels during the luteal phase, typically 7 days after ovulation or around day 21 of a 28-day cycle. This is when progesterone should be at its peak, making it easier to identify if levels are too low or too high.
https://www.oova.life/blog/low-vs-high-progesterone-symptoms
What are the main differences between low and high progesterone symptoms?
Low progesterone typically causes irregular or heavy periods, anxiety, hot flashes, and sleep issues. High progesterone causes bloating, fatigue, intense breast tenderness, and depression-like mood changes. Low progesterone symptoms persist throughout your cycle, while high progesterone symptoms are most intense during the luteal phase.
https://www.oova.life/blog/low-vs-high-progesterone-symptoms
Can you have symptoms of both low and high progesterone?
Some symptoms like breast tenderness and mood changes can occur with both low and high progesterone, making it confusing. However, the timing, intensity, and accompanying symptoms differ. Hormone testing is the best way to determine which imbalance you're experiencing.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
Can stress affect 10 DPO symptoms?
Yes, stress can worsen or mimic 10 DPO symptoms. Stress increases cortisol, which can cause cramping, fatigue, and mood changes similar to both PMS and early pregnancy. During the two-week wait, try stress-reduction techniques like gentle exercise, meditation, or spending time with loved ones.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
Is it better to test at 10 DPO or wait?
It's better to wait until 12–14 DPO for more accurate results. Testing at 10 DPO often leads to false negatives because hCG levels may still be too low. If you absolutely can't wait, use a sensitive early detection test with first morning urine, and be prepared to retest in 2–3 days if negative.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
What does implantation bleeding look like at 10 DPO?
Implantation bleeding at 10 DPO is typically light pink or brown, much lighter than a period, and lasts 1–2 days. It's often just spotting when you wipe or a few drops on a panty liner. However, only 15–20% of pregnant women experience implantation bleeding—most don't have any bleeding at all.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
Why am I cramping at 10 DPO?
Cramping at 10 DPO can be caused by elevated progesterone (whether you're pregnant or not), implantation (if you're pregnant), or premenstrual cramping. Unfortunately, cramping alone can't tell you if you're pregnant since progesterone causes similar symptoms in both scenarios.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
What are the chances of a BFP at 10 DPO?
If you're pregnant, you have about a 50–60% chance of getting a positive test at 10 DPO. This means there's a 40–50% chance of a false negative even if you conceived. Chances improve significantly by 12–14 DPO.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
What DPO is most accurate for pregnancy testing?
14 DPO (the day of your missed period) is the most accurate time to test, with 99% accuracy. 12 DPO offers 80–90% accuracy. 10 DPO has only 50–60% accuracy. For best results, wait as long as you can—ideally until 12–14 DPO.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
Is 10 DPO too early to test?
10 DPO is considered early for pregnancy testing. While some women get positives at 10 DPO, accuracy is only 50–60% if you're pregnant. For best results, wait until 12 DPO (80–90% accuracy) or 14 DPO/missed period (99% accuracy).
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
Can you have implantation at 10 DPO?
Yes, implantation can still occur at 10 DPO, though 84% of women have already implanted by this point. Late implantation at 10–12 DPO is normal. If implantation happens at 10 DPO, you won't get a positive pregnancy test for another 2–3 days.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
What does a negative test at 10 DPO mean?
A negative test at 10 DPO does not mean you're not pregnant. It's very common to get negatives at 10 DPO even if you conceived. Your hCG levels may still be too low, or implantation may have occurred later. Wait until 12–14 DPO to retest for more accurate results.
https://www.oova.life/blog/10-dpo
Can you get a positive pregnancy test at 10 DPO?
Yes, but only about 50–60% of pregnant women will get a positive at 10 DPO. The other 40–50% have hCG levels that are still too low to detect. If you test negative at 10 DPO, wait 2–3 days and test again.
https://www.oova.life/blog/high-progesterone-symptoms
Can high progesterone cause weight gain?
Yes, elevated progesterone can cause temporary weight gain through water retention and bloating. This is a normal part of the luteal phase and early pregnancy.
https://www.oova.life/blog/how-to-increase-estrogen
Does stress affect estrogen levels?
Yes, chronic stress elevates cortisol, which can suppress estrogen production and disrupt hormonal balance. Stress reduction through meditation, yoga, adequate sleep, and self-care practices helps maintain optimal estrogen levels.
https://www.oova.life/blog/how-to-increase-estrogen
When should I consider medical treatment for low estrogen?
Consider medical intervention if natural methods don't improve symptoms after 3 months, if symptoms severely impact quality of life, if you're experiencing early menopause (before 40), or if you have fertility concerns. Hormone replacement therapy may be appropriate in these cases.
https://www.oova.life/blog/how-to-increase-estrogen
What are the signs that my estrogen is increasing?
Signs of rising estrogen include more regular menstrual cycles, reduced hot flashes, improved vaginal lubrication, better mood stability, increased energy, and improved skin elasticity. You may also notice reduced symptoms that originally indicated low estrogen.
https://www.oova.life/blog/how-to-increase-estrogen
Can exercise increase estrogen levels?
Yes, moderate exercise stimulates estrogen release and helps maintain hormonal balance. Aim for 150 minutes of moderate cardio weekly plus strength training twice per week. However, excessive exercise can actually lower estrogen, so balance is key.
https://www.oova.life/blog/how-to-increase-estrogen
How long does it take to increase estrogen naturally?
With consistent dietary and lifestyle changes, you may notice improvements in symptoms within 4-8 weeks. However, significant hormonal changes typically take 2-3 months. Tracking your cycle and symptoms can help you monitor progress.
https://www.oova.life/blog/how-to-increase-estrogen
What foods increase estrogen levels naturally?
Foods high in phytoestrogens can help increase estrogen naturally. The best options include flax seeds (high in lignans), soy products (tofu, tempeh, edamame), lentils, chickpeas, whole grains (oats, quinoa, brown rice), and garlic. These plant compounds mimic estrogen's effects in the body.
https://www.oova.life/blog/perimenopause
What helps relieve hot flashes quickly?
Cool environments, layered clothing, herbal teas, and medical treatments like gabapentin or HRT may help—depending on severity. Lifestyle changes like reducing caffeine and alcohol can also provide relief.
https://www.oova.life/blog/perimenopause
Are there tests to confirm perimenopause?
Yes. Tests measuring estradiol, LH, and FSH levels can indicate hormonal shifts—but diagnosis is often symptom-based since hormone levels fluctuate widely during perimenopause.
https://www.oova.life/blog/perimenopause
How do I know it's perimenopause and not something else?
A doctor may recommend hormone testing (like LH, E3G, and PdG) and track symptom timing. Diagnosis is often based on symptoms combined with age and menstrual pattern changes.
https://www.oova.life/blog/perimenopause
What's the earliest age perimenopause can start?
Some women begin experiencing symptoms as early as their mid-30s, though perimenopause typically starts between ages 38-45.
https://www.oova.life/blog/perimenopause
Does perimenopause affect mental clarity?
Yes. Brain fog and difficulty concentrating are common during hormone fluctuations in perimenopause.
https://www.oova.life/blog/TBD-10-symptoms-and-how-to-get-relief
What happens after the last sign of perimenopause?
After your final period, you enter postmenopause. You'll need 12 consecutive months without a period to confirm menopause. Many symptoms gradually improve, though some like vaginal dryness may persist without treatment.
https://www.oova.life/blog/TBD-10-symptoms-and-how-to-get-relief
When do perimenopause symptoms finally stop?
Some symptoms like brain fog improve after menopause, while others like hot flashes may continue for up to 10 years post-menopause. Vaginal symptoms often persist or worsen without treatment. Each person's timeline is different.
https://www.oova.life/blog/high-progesterone-symptoms
Is high progesterone a sign of pregnancy?
Yes, high progesterone is one of the earliest indicators of pregnancy. Progesterone levels rise significantly after conception to support the developing embryo and reach their peak during the third trimester.
https://www.oova.life/blog/TBD-10-symptoms-and-how-to-get-relief
Can you still get pregnant in late perimenopause?
Yes, you can still get pregnant during perimenopause as long as you're having periods, even if they're infrequent. Continue using birth control until you've gone 12 consecutive months without a period and have officially reached menopause.
https://www.oova.life/blog/TBD-10-symptoms-and-how-to-get-relief
Do symptoms get worse before perimenopause ends?
Yes, most perimenopause symptoms intensify in the final 1-2 years before menopause. Hot flashes peak around your final period, vaginal symptoms worsen, and mood changes increase. However, brain fog typically improves in late perimenopause.
https://www.oova.life/blog/TBD-10-symptoms-and-how-to-get-relief
How long does late perimenopause last?
Late perimenopause typically lasts 1-3 years before your final period. However, the exact duration varies significantly from person to person. You've reached menopause after 12 consecutive months without a period.
https://www.oova.life/blog/high-progesterone-symptoms
What are the symptoms of high progesterone?
High progesterone symptoms include fatigue, bloating, breast tenderness, weight gain, anxiety, depression, headaches, and food cravings. During pregnancy, you may also experience increased nipple sensitivity and muscle aches.
https://www.oova.life/blog/TBD-10-symptoms-and-how-to-get-relief
What are the first signs that perimenopause is ending?
The earliest signs include longer gaps between periods (60+ days), intensifying hot flashes that peak around your final period, and worsening vaginal dryness. These symptoms typically increase in late perimenopause before you reach official menopause.
https://www.oova.life/blog/high-progesterone-symptoms
When should I be concerned about high progesterone?
Consult a healthcare provider if you experience high progesterone symptoms outside your luteal phase when not pregnant, or if symptoms include severe pelvic pain, abnormal vaginal bleeding, or rapid weight gain while on hormone therapy.
https://www.oova.life/blog/high-progesterone-symptoms
How do you test progesterone levels?
Progesterone can be measured through blood tests at your doctor's office or at-home urine tests that measure PdG (a progesterone metabolite). Testing is typically done during the luteal phase, about 7 days after ovulation.

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